The Sonata of Romance
by Nymphadora Florida
Summary: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix as narrated by Luna Lovegood. Cho needs some extra advice in the romantic department, and Luna secretly gives her tips. Rated T for a wee bit of swearing.


The Sonata of Romance

"Thou soft from yonder window breaks, it is the east, and Juliet is the sun."

How lucky to be Juliet. But I, Luna Lovegood make a vow from this day forward never to love or be loved in return.

I stared out the blank window in the Ravenclaw Common Room, watching them on the grass, being romantic, talking, kissing…I would never be like that. Ever. I was too ugly. I was too random. I was too…Luna. Nobody would ever love me. On a bright April day, everyone was expected to be outside, enjoying the sunshine. But I liked darkness; the darkness of my life, the darkness of the deep purple shades that I closed immediately in solitary sadness.

Yet, somehow, I felt a yearning inside me to be like them. It must be a wonderful feeling, love. I was reflecting on these thoughts when…

He walked in.

That's right, he just walked in like he owned the place. Why would he ever care about me, about Luna? He didn't, and that must've been why he was here…to make me suffer the un-daunting task of watching him enjoy something.

"Hello Luna," he said kindly, looking at me as if I mattered.

"Hello," I said in my dreamy tone, wondering when he was going to leave me to my solitude.

But instead he sat down next to me!

Self-less git! Damn, I hate people who like me! I shall have to fix this…

"What are you doing here, Erik?"

"Out of boredom, I was looking for you."

"Why in the hell would you want to see me, Loony Lovegood?"

"In the deepest depths of my mind I have no bloody idea."

"Then please leave me alone to my quiet time."

"Quiet time? Luna, you've been sitting up here since four o'clock in the morning, it's a bright beautiful sunny day…why aren't you outside?"

I closed the curtains with a rush to face him.

"Forget it. It doesn't matter and nobody cares, and you're not going to talk to me anymore. So shut up and leave me alone."

"No need to get so defensive."

"Erik just buzz off."

"I'm not a bee, Loony."

Ah, mean-ness. I love it when he's mean to me. So passionate and true about what he says and yet…

Wait, what am I saying? Ewww…I sooo do NOT have a crush on Erik Johnson? My one and only friend? Besides if we ever did get a relationship, it would never work out because then our friendship would be ruined…and I'd have nobody left for…

"Hello? Earth to Luna? You got that weird look in your eyes again."

"What?"

"Your gray eyes went blank. Are you alright?"

"You know very well, Mr. Johnson that I am always alright when it comes to my eyes."

"Are you sure nothing happened to them when your mother died."

Damn eyes! Stop welling up with tears!

"I'm sorry, Luna…"

"Its fine," I said, walking away to retreat to my dormitory.

"But Luna…"

"Forget it," I said, flopping down on my bed. I cried myself to sleep until I woke up several hours later to hear voices in the other beds in the dormitory.

"Oh, he is _so_ hot, Cho! You should totally go out with him!" said one of my fellow, giddy Ravenclaw girls.

"I don't know…I mean…this is Harvey _Johnson_ we're talking about! I mean…who names their kid _Harvey_? What kind of a name is that?" Cho replied happily, in a preppy tone.

And then it hit me…

"But he's _so _much better than his little brother! I mean, come _on_, Cho…you haven't had a boy since, well, since…"

"Please don't say his name!" pleaded Cho dramatically.

"Sorry," apologized the other girl.

"I don't know…I've had this other boy on my mind…"

"Oh, do tell!" said the blonde excitedly.

"Okay, but you can't tell a _soul_! If I'm found out, this could totally ruin my social life!"

"Just spill!"

"Harry Potter."

"Oh Merlin," replied the blonde, let down by this sudden whisk of Harry-ness.

"Don't you think he's cute?"

"Cho…Cho…he's a year _younger_ than you. You've never dated _anyone_ who's younger than you."

"Well, no…but…he's really cute…and that untidy black hair is the sweetest thing! Oh, and his scar…it's so…_sexy_…" said Cho, flopping down on her back, twirling her hair.

"You have totally lost your mind. You want to date _Harry Potter_? Cho, what's wrong with you?"

"I'm in love, Marietta!" she said happily.

"Oh…Merlin…not this again…"

"Don't you see? Harry is _so_ perfect for me! He's tall, and thin, and handsome, and cute, and nice, and shy and, Merlin…I bet he's such a great kisser and…"

"Okay, stop grossing me out. This is really starting to get disgusting…"

"Oh, I wonder if he likes dancing…"

"Goodnight, Cho…"

Cho's friend had deserted her for some much needed sleep. Cho went on twirling her hair as if nothing had changed.

I knew I had to do something. "Psst…Cho?" I whispered in the darkness, walking over to her bed.

"Who's that?" she whispered frantically, immediately sitting up and looking around.

"Oh…it's just me, Luna…"

"Oh…Luna…"

"Look, I know you're not really _fond _of me or anything…but, look. Harry Potter is really not the guy for you."  
"Oh _please_! What do you know about boys?"

"Look, I don't know a lot…maybe not even a little, but…I really think you need some help on this matter. Harry is not the guy for you."

"Really?" she asked me, her eyes big and full of curiosity.

"He's got his other reasons for not dating right now. You should go out with…hmmm…Roger Davies?"

"Wow, that's a brilliant idea! You should be a matchmaker!"

"Look, I'm not trying to be famous; I just want to help you out. I know you'd be a public disgrace if you were found talking to me, so how about every night, before we go to sleep, I'll talk to you about the days romance, okay?"

"Sounds like a deal to me!" said Cho excitedly.

"What should we call these meetings?" I asked her, wondering if the ditsy girl would be able to think of something good.

"Ooo…how about…Luna and Cho's Sonata of Romance!"

"Brilliant. Goodnight, Cho."

"Goodnight, Luna!"

This was going to be interesting.

Over the next several months, I would consult Cho's love life, saying 'yay' or 'neigh' to those boys she thought she crushed on. All was going perfect, until I was invited to a secret meeting in the Hog's Head about a secret organization against Umbridge.

Quite surprisingly, the D.A.D.A. meeting took place in (of all places) the Hog's Head. With its disgusting, old charm, and unsanitary conditions, it surprised me that Hermione Granger would; of all people organize a meeting here. However, I went just to go, and Cho wanted me to "tag-along"…though…I didn't know why at the time, she brought one of her stupid giggling friends along…whose name I couldn't remember.

I followed Cho, putting my famous "dreamy expression" on, pretending not to care or notice anything.

But, it's not like Harry would've noticed me…why do I _want_ Harry to notice me?

That I never figured out.

However, on with the story.

Granger started out anxious and a bet nerved (she started talking in a falsetto tone…which she never does…); babbling on about what we already knew…bla bla…Umbridge being what she was…bla bla…

So then…that idiot Hufflepuff, Zacharias Smith spoke up, not believing anything and challenging Hermione to a battle of wits…when Harry and Ron joined in.

It was as if, Harry for some reason was a bit upset…more than a bit upset. Like he couldn't get control of his grinding teeth, like he kept stabbing Hermione with his angry looks…he kept treating the rest of us like he didn't know what was coming next. People started asking him about Cedric and patronuses, and how he killed the basilisk, and how he got through all the tasks at the Tri-Wizard Tournament and all that other rubbish.

That doesn't matter to me, and at the time it didn't either. So, I sat there with my usual gaze in the corner, acting oblivious to all that was happening around me.

Hermione then said something like this, "We think the reason Umbridge doesn't want us trained in Defense Against the Dark Arts is that she's got some…some mad idea that Dumbledore could use the students in the school as a private army. She thinks he'd mobilize us against the ministry."

My turn to finally speak. "Well, that makes sense. After all, Cornelius Fudge has got his own private army."

I laughed to myself. Harry was stupid enough to believe this, "What?" he asked.

"Yes, he's got an army of heliopaths," I supplied, knowing Hermione would go nuts over this.

"No, he hasn't," said Hermione.

"Yes, he has," I argued.

That stupid Gryffindor tag-a-long in the corner Neville spoke up, asking what heliopaths were. "They're spirits of fire. Great tall flaming creatures that gallop across the ground, burning everything in front of…"

"They don't exist, Neville," said Hermione tartly.

"Oh yes they do!" I exclaimed angrily.

"I'm sorry, but where's the _proof_ of that?" Hermione snapped.

"There are plenty or eyewitness accounts, just because you're so narrow minded you need to have everything shoved under your nose before you…"

Urgh. And then Ginny (only Weasley girl) started talking and we got back on track. I wish Hermione would understand me. She seems like she'd make a really good friend, but she _has _to criticize me about everything I do…from Daddy running the Quibbler, to the heliopaths…it's always Luna that's the problem.

So then, we all had to sign this form thingy that we wouldn't tell anybody or something bad would happen to us or whatever.

Later that night, Cho and I talked about the organization.

"It seems a Harry thing to do…" said Cho dreamily.

"Not still crushing on him, are you?"

"Yes."

"Have we not discussed _anything_?" I asked in exasperation.

"We have…but I really want to date Harry."

"Well, you're going to have to make the first move then, because Harry is not the kind of guy who'd ask you out."

"Fine. I've asked loads of guys to go out with me!" said Cho indignantly, flipping her hair.

"Hmm…like who?"

"Well…there was that one guy in second year…"

"One guy? _That one guy?_ You can't even remember the bloke's name?"

"I remember…I'm just tired, Luna," said Cho, flopping down on her four poster.

"Look, I'm not trying to make you feel uncomfortable but…"

"So, what's with you and that one guy…Erik?"

"What?"

"I saw him with you the other day."

"That's beside what we're talking about…"

"It doesn't matter what we _were_ talking about…we are talking about _other_ things now…like this Erik guy! I can _totally _tell you like him!"

"This is getting way off topic," I replied numbly.

"But that…"

"No buts!"

The last thing I wanted right now was to hear about Erik. What was Cho thinking? _Erik?_ _Gross!_ The last person I wanted to go out with was _Erik_!

"This is stupid. Good night, Cho!" I called, as if waving Bon Voyage to a ship sailing somewhere far away.

I raged with fear. It was late, after all and Cho hadn't showed up to our meeting.

I left from the D.A. happy and yet pleased with myself…I _had_, after all, mastered the Impediment Jinx.

She came to her bed in a daze, twirling her hair…

Oh, no.

Oh no no no no no…

Oh no no no no no no no…

She hadn't…

She couldn't have…

This was a disaster.

"You're late," I said rather distastefully.

She only sighed as if not talking to me, "Oh, my love…at last I've found you…"

"Who've you found?" I asked irritably.

"Well I…"

"Oh no…let me guess."

"Go ahead," she said excitedly, in her preppiest voice, "guess!"

"Roger Davies…"

"No silly!" she said, added a little giggle at the end.

"Terry Boot…"

"Oh, that's disgusting! Did you really think I'd go out with a stinky Boot?"

"Please don't be…"

"Yes…"

"Oh my God."

"Oh my yes!"

"You kissed him."

"Oh, Luna, you've got to say his name!" she said, sitting up on her knees.

I could feel my teeth and fists clenching up.

"YOU KISSED HARRY POTTER!"I yelled irritably.

"Oh, yes…"

"HELL NO!"

"But Luna…"

"WE TALKED ABOUT THIS, REMEMBER?"

"It's not your love life! It's mine!"

"WHO SAID IT WASN'T my…"

"Oh my goodness…no…you have a _crush_ on Harry Potter? This is really rich, Luna! You know I like him, it makes him off limits for you because he's mine now!"

"Goodnight, Cho!"

"You can't run from me forever!"

"I'm not running from you, I'm going to bed!" I practically screamed.

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Fine."

"Fine."

This wasn't going to get any easier.

It was Valentine's Day. The most hated day of the year for me. And this year was the worst; it was the 10th Anniversary of my mother's death.

Cho came back from Hogsmeade in tears; I knew this was Harry's doing. She stomped into the Girl's Dormitory, eyeliner smeared down her face, her arms crossed.

"What'd he do?" I asked slowly, dreading the rambling I knew was going to happen in a few minutes.

"It's none of your concern!" she huffed, sitting down on her bed and crossing her legs, her head facing the window.

"No, really…I want to know…" I said, half-interested, half-dreamily.

"HARRY POTTER! WHO NAMES THEIR KID HARRY POTTER? I MEAN FOR ONE THING, _HARRY_ IS A WORSE NAME ALL BY ITSELF, BUT THEN POTTER? AND I DON'T THINK HE LOOKS LIKE HIS FATHER ANYWAYS…BLA BLA ABOUT HIS DEAD MOTHER'S EYES! THE _HEATHROB_ OF HIS YEAR? HE TREATED ME TERRIBLE! I'VE NEVER BEEN SO INSULTED IN ALL MY LIFE…"

"Whoa…Cho…calm down!"

"I CAN'T CALM DOWN! I WENT AND GOT A MANICURE AND A FRESH PEDICURE JUST FOR HIM…I DID MY HAIR PERFECT THIS MORNING, AND THIS IS HOW HE REPAYS ME? THE YELLOW-BELLIED PIECE OF SCUM THAT DOESN'T DESERVE TO WALK THIS EARTH…"

"Hey, now, he doesn't deserve…"

"HE DIDN'T EVEN KISS ME! WE HAD TO WATCH ROGER DAVIES MAKE-OUT THE ENTIRE TIME AND ALL HE HAD TO TALK ABOUT WAS HERMIONE GRANGER! IT WAS GRANGER THIS AND GRANGER THAT, AND 'HOW ABOUT WE GO MEET HERMIONE AT THE THREE BROOMSTICKS LATER' AND ALL OF THAT! IF I DIDN'T KNOW ANY BETTER HE AND HERMIONE WERE…"

"CHO CHANG SHUT THE HELL UP RIGHT NOW!" I screamed.

Cho looked flabbergasted. She looked at me like I didn't have a care about her in the world.

"Look," I said quietly, "Harry isn't dating Hermione or anything like that. Him and Hermione and Ron are all best friends…did you even stop to think about that before you went on a rampage in front of him?"

Cho shook her head.

"Look, Cho. I know this is going to be painful letting him go, but he doesn't deserve this…and if you won't treat him like the gentleman he is, than you don't deserve to be with him…"

Cho looked as if she'd been slapped in the face.

"Cho? Hello? Earth to Cho?"

"You like him!" she exclaimed haughtily, tears streaming down her face.

"What?" I said, beyond belief.

"You like Harry!" she sobbed through her pillow.

"Eww! I do _not_ like Harry."

She stopped for a minute, sniffed, and raised her head. "You don't?"

"I just told you I didn't!" I said simply. When was she going to get it through her head? "I like somebody else!"

"Really? Who?"

"Okay, I like two people! There, I said it! I like Erik Johnson and Neville Longbottom…" Oh damn. I just told the most popular girl at Hogwarts my two greatest crushes. I'm dead now. It'll be all over the school by tomorrow.

She just sat there and grinned.

"Well, I'm going to go to dinner if you don't mind…"

"Wait! You're not going to tell anybody, are you? You can't, Cho, you just can't! I can't believe I even told you! You've got to respect me on this one! Please? Don't even tell what's-her-face, that one kid you always hang out with…"

"I'm not going to tell anybody if that's what you're concerned about!" she said, an evil grin appearing on her face.

"Then what's that weird look for?" I demanded. She was going to tell somebody, I could tell from her eyes and body language.

"I'm going to get revenge on Harry!" she said happily.

"Cho, that's going _way_ too far! Just leave him alone!" I said, my eyes widening.

"I'm not going to do anything to _him_, stupid! I'm going to date Roger!"

"Perfect. You two will be perfect for each other! I'm sure of it!"

"You think so? Really? I wonder how he kisses…anyways…off to dinner I go!"

Urgh. Cho makes me so mad sometimes I just want to burst. How. Dare. She. Making fun of innocent Harry, who's probably going through enough without her, and just needs somebody to talk to…and there goes Cho. Rambling her head off about nothing. Nothing. I might as well head down to dinner. What else do I have to do?

The rest of the year was history in the making. I became part of the 'Dream Team' with Ron, Harry, Hermione and Neville. Though, we didn't exactly succeed, thanks a lot to Cho's shallow friend, Marietta.

The next year, Cho ignored me the entire time. And though it seemed she didn't learn anything…she ended up dating Roger that year, too.

I guess you could say that our 'Sonata' was complete. I guess you could say that I taught Cho a little bit about life, and love. But one thing was for sure. This wasn't over yet. And I knew it would take some doing for me to learn the same lessons Cho did. She went and got herself a man…not one that would please me much, but perfect for her. I'll have to muster up some courage in the meantime and ask Neville out.

But this Sonata is over. Case closed.


End file.
